The thing about being a teacher, somedays you have it all under control. Your routine is flawless, your students actually listen and you were not given a pile of paper work to complete by tomorrow. When this happen, treasure it because they don’t happen that often.
The rest of the time, you don’t have it under control. Your projector refuse to work, you realize your student don’t know the meaning of “rules,” and your whole lesson plan falls apart and you suddenly have a ko-kurikulum list to type and hand in by tomorrow. Yes, you guessed it. This was today.
Somedays we feel like the world’s hero, when a student who never uttered an English word, speaks to you, “Teacher, I want to go toilet!” We feel like screaming and shouting out of joy. We feel like you can go through this journey again.
Somedays, we feel crushed. We feel there’s no point in teaching, because they are years behind. We lose it and scream at the class, “If you don’t sit down at your places, I will bring the discipline teacher in!” We hold our tears and rush to the toilet cubicle and cry in silence. At night we curl up into a ball, thinking of our life decision all over again.
Not only we have to deal with dramas in school, we also a personal life that needs attention. The worst days are the days where you’re hurting inside and you still walk in the class, put a smile on your face, and begin teaching. But in a way though, the hurt becomes less painful. It’s like treating it with a balm, when you choose the help, regardless of what’s happening on the inside. That my friend, makes you beautifully broken.
Here’s to all teachers who still choose to discipline a rude child, wipe the tears of a crying child and teach with an innermost, admirable courage regardless of what they’re feeling on the inside.